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flipping the kill switch

break up

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So as you may know in recent times i met someone from my past and if i do remember correctly i posted up a piece on this matter some blogs back and well since than recent things have developed so i wanted to well make it read worthy and just had to get it out of my system.

Now the other day i met my ex’s friends in a local fast food restaurant and decided to sit with him and his kiddies and shoot the breeze while he was tending to his chiselers as you do on a busy Tuesday morning. It wasnt my intention to talk and stay long with the friend but i always did have time for this person in question. So after a quick coffee and scooping up one chiselers at a time. It turns out that well my ex was not entirely honest when it came to a few events that happened well in recent times. You see the ex apparently told a few other people that i asked him for a second chance but once again just to clarify things i didn’t and with that i had to clean up this mess once more. Once i had cleared up a few things with the friend i walked away with my head help up high.

But here is my question to you all. Should we as people always feel the need to have ghosts of our past hanging around and lingering about like a bad presence or worse still like a bad smell. Here is my views on what i think about this matter. Anytime i meet someone and i date them things go ok and everything is ok. but say through no fault of my own and say things dont work out i just break up with them and move on. I delete them from my facebook i take out all pictures that reminded me of happy times and yes even i get rid of their numbers from my phone and here is my reason why to rash decisions and actions. I just think the quick getting rid of everything movement is not a self defensive move its more like hmm ok i dont need this bs following me around and i also need to think about things and about my own life.

What i dont understand is when people like to keep lingering on in the past and keep mementos of things that may remind them of them and that time that they were in that made them happy. Its now even made worse on social networking sites. I now see with people getting together and splitting up there is pics that may have been tagged on their sites and with that comes up the curious cat in all of us the one that feels the need to check out the pics and comments and cue yes the stomach churning questions that come with looking at past posts such as is she prettier than me do you still have feelings for her/him and i wont even go there with the rest of this. But you see this is why i flip the kill switch.

I like to think of deleting past photos and servering ties with the past because it may not serve as any purpose in the future. I know this may appear as heartless but hey a girl has to do what shes gotta do in order to survive in this world and most importantly in this life. Now sadly this may also mean i may loose friends over this strongly opinionated piece of work but im choosing to stick to my guns in this stance. Does it make me selfish no does it make me a bitch no it just makes me more saner for doing this sharp and rash move and it also saves me a fortune in therapy bills as well.

 
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Posted by on 06/26/2013 in Uncategorized

 

lost for words and everything in between

So it would appear of late i am yet again going thrpugh the yearly slump in where nothing is going on. After the incredible high of being in bloom in the phoenix park with my cosplayer friends im now feeling flat. Now even the sheer thought of purchasing my mumford and sons tickets next week can even pick me up. I dont know once again why this is for. I guess im just feeling lost and massively confused. I did however found out that its now exactly a year to the date that a handsome laughing chavlier popped into my life turned me upside a few times and always make me laugh with his minion impressions and always fed me good food and always had time for a joke and good smoke. But of late we haven’t well being in touch and that makes me sad. It makes me sad in a way because i enjoy the buzz of being around them and having a laugh. But sadly of late i have once again lost the interest and passion for a lot of things. Im now even a distance stranger on social networking sites and yes even i dont tweet anymore. Yeah im going through the monthly slumps to end all slumps and f**k me i hate the way it makes me feel.

I have now even become a snappy horrible person even the thought of doing certain things now makes me really upset. Like say for one example im suppose to be going air softing next weekend in a world war 2 scenario game and that does not even lift my spirits. So yeah to say the least im not exactly going through a good time once again and yes it is to say the least a complete mind f**k to say the least. But in saying this now i know better than to post up personal stuff on my blog but i do know what needs to be done and i need to well assess everything and more in my life. But like every time i do the assessing part nothing seems to change and i once again am left like feeling a rat on a wheel running around constantly.  To say the least vagab0ndage is is a vicious cycle and seriously needs to get this dealt with and soon.

But you see i kind of feel like that i am at times bending over backwards to please people that i dont even like anymore. I mean i do love the rush i get sometimes for when it comes to going out and well enjoying what i do but of late the buzz is not felt i feel slightly uncomfortable in everything i say do or even touch or even bring up and i now at times cry scream even walk out at situations like this and sadly its killing me hugely. Once again i am reminded that i have brought this subject up again but jesus christ something has really got to give and soon. The way i feel right now i could maybe roll over and give up on everything and not even care anymore. I so do not want to do this but jesus christ what other option do i have. now even writiong up on this tough issue again is making me feel uncomfortable and i think it would be high time to well asses everything and keep whats worth fighting for and throw away whats not worth having here. so wish me luck on this.

 
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Posted by on 06/17/2013 in daily rants

 

Cosplay Bloom in the Phoenix Park 2013

So over the last week i got the exciting and fun opportunity of doing photography in bloom in the phoenix park  with a few new fantastic friends who were garden designers and photographers and yes even there was a few cosplayers at this awesome event. I was there for a few days so here is a break down of what happened on each day and i will also be writing up on what happened and how bloom in the phoenix park get set up. The bloom in the phoenix park is sponsored by failte ireland and the gathering 2013 and they are also sponsored by a few irish companies that provided the gardeners with equipment for the show. The bloom in the phoenix park ran from 29th of may and ran until the 2 June 12013.

So firstly i hear you all ask what exactly is bloom. Well bloom is the Irish answer to the Chelsea garden how that they have in merry old England. The only big difference is we would tend to be more orientated towards gorgeous gardens and beautiful flowers. The bloom event has been running in Ireland for the last few years and every year bloom gets a lot of entries in from people nation wide to show their ideas for their gardens to be put in the show. Now with this being my first year in bloom i would have to say i was very impressed to say the least with each garden that i got to visit and shoot photos of. There are many categories that were in the gadens and each category would vary from the following. Small gardens medium gardens large gardens and concept gardens. Each designer brought in their own ideas and had to work in their requested space and also had to work on deadlines so time and space was the essence of getting everything done professionally and from what i see the designers used this to their advantage.

One the first day which was the 29 may we had a soft opening and we got to experience first hand of what the gardens were like and we also got to see what we got to work with. When i entered the phoenix grounds it was quite an eye opener to say the least there was such an awestruck sight of beautiful gardens all round and there was a serene sense of calm alround. It also helped that we had great weather to boot. It was also the day the cosplayers got to enter the garden and have fun with too. For those of you who do not know cosplay. Cosplay is  dressing up and role playing as Japanese cartoon characters they can vary from anime animation american cartoons and even video game characters and when the cosplayers took to the gardens it was than when the magic happened.

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The cosplayers ready to enter bloom in the phoenix park.

When the cosplayers got to enter the park and gardens it was than that’s when the excitement and buzz started to happen. Each photographer even including myself were armed and ready with our cameras ready to shoot and to get out cosplayers posing. Each cosplayer that is pictured in this shot has their own elements and their own back ground story of who their character is and what they are all about. I was even impressed with how person told me in how they created their clothing and items and loved how even when they were not in character you could see their personality traits shine through. The cosplayers made the day interesting in how they were willing to pose into position and were even great in working along with each and different garden we got to visit.

The first and main garden we got to visit and work with over the 3 days that we were there was the awesomely titled destination bloom. Destination Bloom is the brain child of Fiann O Nuallain and Lisa Kelly. The conpect and idea for destination bloom was science fiction and the b movies of yesterday year. The garden itself was set up on a hill and had evil plant eyes and a huge space ship to boot as well. The theme of the garden was about alien invasive species that are now creating trouble in the garden with bugs and what not to. The garden also had a hidden shed in where you could just hide in and maybe even conspire to do your next move for when it came to well confronting the space aliens. The cosplayers to say the least had a lot if fun in this garden.

The cosplayers take over destination bloom.

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What i really loved about the first day of bloom in the phonenix park was how each cosplayer was willing to pose and use their own characters traits to their advantage in each shoot. From a photographers point of view it was nothing short of amazing doing each click and see the results on my camera. It was nothing short of amazing when the cosplayers even did a spot of role playing for me while in each feature garden and that its in itself was nothing short of sheer genius.  As you may see in my next few pictures that i will post up here.

It was even more fun when destination bloom designer Fiann O Nuallain got to step in and take part in the photography side of things. 

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Yet another shot of the awesome cosplayers doing what they do best and more.

The next garden that we got to visit and shot was the delightfully the wizard of oz sanctuary garden. I can say being a high fan of the wizard of oz this was my favourite garden to shoot the cosplayers and even see them work their magic. We even got the lovely Dorothy and of course the wicked witch to pose in the photos as well. I have to say what i loved about the wizard of oz garden was the little touches that were out in the garden such as the munchkins the yellow brick road and even the scare cow was nicely put in the garden to. I also think it was an enjoyable sight for both children and adults alike.

We off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of oz.

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For our second day of bloom in the phoenix park we decided to get yet more awesome cosplayers in and even a gorgeous 1950s pin up girl for our cosplay garden shoots. The photo that will be shown in the next paragraph of of miss Betty Paige and the the lovely ladies from the sucker punch movie. My friend amy also did yet another amazing cosplay outfit and once again it was a great day to have fun in the sun and get a lot of nice gorgeous photos taken in bloom in the phoenix park.

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Amy Osata Lucy and Ades our cosplayers are all set for day 2 for bloom in the phoenix park.

Four our second day in bloom we decided to pick and choose a few different gardens for out shoots. The one garden that did stand out for use was the beautiful  concern world wide 1000 days garden. The garden was created by garden designer Paul Martin and he went with the idea of having an african theme for this garden. His idea for the garden was the time it takes from a mothers pregnancy to her child second birthday. It was to raise the awareness of how important and vital is it to have fresh clean running water and nutrition for both mother and baby. The garden was laid out beautifully with a gorgeous hut that had a straw roof and beautiful African color ran throughout the whole of the garden.We also had the great cosplay talents of the lovely miss Natasha Sazenski shes the cosplay girl with the blue hair and cute pink dress.

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Picture of the gorgeous concern world wide 1000 days garden with the cosplayers.

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This beautiful shot was taken at the concern world wide 1000 days garden the hut would be the same hut used in Africa for mothers and their children. 

For the next shoot in bloom in the phoenix park. We decided to revisit the destination bloom garden once more and it did not fail to disappoint yet again as more fantastic shots of the cosplayer were taken once again. When the following shot was taken. the Cosplay girls even got to shoot a video which is available on youtube and for all our own viewing pleasure i will even post it up here now so you can all check it out. It was also with good timing that our Irish leader Enda Kenny partook in this vid as well.

Cosplay girls at bloom in the phoenix park.

Now for the 3rd and final day of bloom in the park. We all decided to well go out with a bang and we certainly did. As the day roll on forth we even got to work with some more awesome cosplayers we even got to work with some storm troopers assassinations creed the gorgeous miss Harley Quinn from the barman cartoon series and  we even got data from star trek and even a 1950s pin up model to work along with everyone too. To say the least the buzz and craic was 90 in bloom and it also made for such fantastic photo opportunities to be had as well. Both the cosplayers and vistors to bloom in the phoenix park it to be a fantastic day. Most of the cosplays that took part that day decided to descent on to the destination bloom garden once again and it did not disappoint one bit. All cosplayers were ready to go with their signature poses and even happily posed with the public to.

bloom in the park anthony bartley

Cosplayers bloom in the phoenix park image courtesy of Anthony Bartley photography.

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Even data aka Alan Delaney was checking out for different types of plant species in destination bloom at bloom in the phoenix park. Photo credits courtesy of Anthony Bartley Photography 

Now after spending 3 days with both shooting and modelling for bloom in the phoenix park i would have to say i really enojyed myself. All the gardens that i got to visit and shoot were just a fantastic and amazing to say the least and it gave me ideas ro use and work with for my own garden and i could not thank the following people for letting take part in this awesome experience and here is who i would like to thank. Phoenix park and bord bia for sponsoring and opening up the huge space. Amy king from Cosplay Ireland for letting me have the great opportunity of shooting herself and her fellow cosplayer friends in the park Fiann O Nuallian and Lisa Kelly for letting us use the garden and also posing along in with the cosplayers and many thanks to also Anthony Bartley for taking pictures and letting use use them for our social networking sites and also thanks to Joe Corrigan for taking the pictures and also making the video short cosplay girls in bloom. Also huge thanks to everyone who came along and helped us put through out the 3 days that we were there. So lets bring on bloom 2014.  For more images of bloom in the phoenix park 2013 please find Anthony Bartley photography on Facebook. Please also check out on facebook cosplay ireland for yet more stunning awesome photos.

 
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Posted by on 06/07/2013 in Music and gig reviews

 

welcome to the wonderful world of routine where everything is not as it seems..

brains

 

 

Now talk about a weird title hey but when you do read this you can more than understand where im coming from on tonights piece. Now it would see in the last while i have picked up this thing called a routine. now i have to say and will be the first to admit i hate routine like i hate most responsibilities like getting things done around the house getting the bank done and also sorting out my own life it needs to be done.  Now i have to say when i first started this routine side of things for my life i hated it. I would kick and scream and bitch and moan and yes even at times cry over what needed to be done. But now that i have the routine of my every day life closely monitored and done i can feel and see things differently now.

I feel that with my new routine which i thought at first yeah this ain’t going to work for me is now like meeting an old friend and picking up where you left off. I have to say i feel calmer happier and well feel well within myself that i can mange things better and get on top of things and get them done quicker myself. But with routine sometimes only sometimes certain things can get boring and it gets to times like that in where i do think hmm should i really ddo this task today and than i think about to a life of no routine and think ohh yes i will feel better when that job is done and i can cross it off my list. I have to admit though my routine fell out of shorts of late due to home pressures and well general every day bother but now im back on track.

Im also happy to admit that now i have signed up for a full time graphic design course and also looking forward to well doing the 9 to 5 hours 5 days over 7 and also it will be good to be out with society and well it will also mean i can well make plans for the future for myself and my puppy. But what worries me though is this what if i don’t have enough time for the puppy and what if i dont have enough time to see my friends and well indulge my own hobbies and interests but thankfully now i’m working on it and not over thinking to much about stuff now. i think if anything well there is 2 thoughts here on this piece. First thought is well your thinking way to much and you need to relax and breathe and think about things carefully 1. Two well everything will fall into place and take your time. If i do come to place into my life in where i need to separate the wheat from the chaft that so be it. I mean if anything it will be a new challenge to face up to and who knows it could be only the making of me so lets hope either way i get somewhere and wish me luck with this.

 
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Posted by on 05/20/2013 in daily rants

 

its nuking time…

now for the last while i have been in a slump for ideas on a few blog piece but once again urban dictionary has saved me from this boredom and long behild here is a brief explanation into this piece.

To considering deleting “friends” from your Facebook friends list or deactivating your Facebook account entirely based on the sole perception that you aren’t really friends with these people. To start from the ground up afterwards with a new account or keep in touch only with those who survive the “nuke”

FB2

 

Now if i may be honest here i had to do the facebook nuke through no fault of my own about 6 months back and here is my reasons. Some time back i got into trouble on facebook for my views and ideas and thoughts on a lot of things and long behold one day when a person posted something up on a private group page that i was a member with i than decided to well let rip mainly my reason for the ripping was because well this person upset me and also they needed to be told a few home truths about themselves so i went forth let rip and left it at that. I left things alone and let the dust settle for a few days when i go back to log onto my account and i was blocked. Now to make a long story short i was blocked out of my account the content of my page was reported so i than said f**k it i dont have time for this and than opened up a private and new account.

It was quite simply to open the new account it was hard though taking everything back from my old account and posting it on the new page. In fact it got so hard i had to shut down and walk away before it drove me nuts. Now when i started up the new account which was only a matter of hours and a click of the mouse i got a huge warm welcome home. Ohh why the new page and why are you here now and im confused. It was than i had to explain what exactly happened and long behold i managed to get everyone back onto the account. Now i would have to say in doing this nuking accounts i can now say i can breath easily and also go about my social networking habits the best way i can. I now dont get stressed out over stupid posts well not as much as i use to and now i use facebook now as a sound cloud and my own bitch and i make it work for me. But in recent times when i have now been unblocked and in checking with my old account i have discovered that people are still adding me. Now i dont have problems with people adding me but why add me for if we have absolutely nothing in common with each other. So far i have had 3 people adding me from the old account and i think its the right time to say it here i dont really have anything in common with you.

I always try to warn people when they add me they should prepare themselves as i dont sugarcoat anything and well i add my own thoughts views pics even youtube clips on what i like. But now in saying this i do have to ask why even add me if you know your going yo get offended and report me to facebook. I think you would see from my own fb there is nothing to get offended by unless zombie killing and weaphons upset you than there is always the unfriend button i would suggest that you use it and get over yourself.

 
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Posted by on 05/16/2013 in daily rants

 

album review thomas janak the journey

Following on from the wonderful and massive album that is rainbow bridge. My fellow animal rights activist and close friend Thomas Janak has now released a new album called the journey.

The journey is quite simply does exactly what is says on the album cover when i put on the cd and listened to the album for the first time i have to say i really enjoyed the soothing chilled out vibes and also with a hint of good electronica that would be reminiscent of germany’s kraft work with thomas’s own unique style of making his good blissed out beats to listen to with also very thoughtful and relaxing lyrics to listen to as well.

The opening track that opens the album is called the journey i have to say i liked what it offered with its futuristic sounds and blissed put beats which i found was also quite relaxing and ohh so calming to.

The next song that stood out for me was the song wrong. it had such a relaxing sound with soothing beats and it was also a sad song but sad is always good it was to me quite a personal song and it was one of heart break and those who may have been let down i have to say i enjoyed it a lot and thomas’s voice made it quite soothing to listening to.

The next track on the album was the superb into the city. this song for me had good uptempo beats and reminds of well going out and having a good time at discos you could maybe even create your own little disco at home with this track i have to say i really enjoyed the track a lot.

The next track that really put the album on the map for me was the sublime sacred life its just so calm and relaxing to listening to and its also reminds me of being one with nature and its also a great track to listen to while doing yoga as well which helped me while doing my yoga sessions at home.

I have to say i listen to this cd a few times over and every time i listen to it i cant help but find more ways to love this cd and with thomas janaks soothing voice and working of words with his awesome lyrics i would strongly recommend if anyone needs a cd to relax and listen to at home while working studying and wants a break away from the commercial chill out albums i would highly recommand the journey. The journey has something for everyone and i can assure you wont be disappointed

 
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Posted by on 05/15/2013 in Music and gig reviews

 

big fish swimming in a tiny pond.

brayprom

 

Now as you all know or may not know i happen to live in the little seaside town of bray co wicklow. Now people would always come up to me and say ahh bray how i love that town i remember walking along the promenade along with the parents as a child and also going to the fun fairs and having a blast on the waltzers and ahh sure the craic we would all have when we would visit so and so’s place and and we had such fond memories of this town and we should go there again.

Now all the while im hearing all this nostalgia of how my town was back in the day and its very much i would say in recent times say like like the last 20 odd so years of this nice town image that people paint. I kind of feel like saying yeah it must have been good to you know be able to reminisce about the good times that you all had there. Now fast forward 20 odd years later and sadly well my home town is dying a death. With recent events of companies shutting up shop and even now with my local and only video store getting ready for the guillotine as it were (xtra-vision video dvd stores went into receivership the other day fingers and toes crossed they don’t close down) i am well kind of feeling like yeah do i really want to stay here or what would be the best thing to do.

Now after careful consideration and a lot of careful thinking and planning i’m staying put in where i am but again im considering my options for a lot of different things. You see being in a small town it can but only bring out a ruthless and if i dare say greedy side to a lot of folks that do live here and sadly it now even shows in the every day world that is the social media show and tell theatre. Once again i will say this and to be honest with ya it will make you think ohh gee your being heartless or you may even say well fair point indeed. I find at times that the negativity and bs vibes that comes with this town is a really bad thing. Its now become so bad of late that i would not happily admit to shopping in dublin’s fair city and here is why. one there is always a chirpy smile from staff and customers alike nearly in every place you go to. Two there is more variety choice and value for money and three if you build up a friendship or even a professional relationship with the shop owners and why not you are sure to get a lot more value for money.

I think sadly with the way ireland has reacted to the economic bust people always want to run you down and say ahh here nothing good will come of this and heres a wee nugget of truth here people. I don’t earn much being a part time student but what i do earn i would happily put it into online stores and even people running a small business as long as you cater to my needs and give me a friendly smile than im all yours. But please leave all your unwanted bs shite talk at the door. yes we are going through a bad time but heres a wee thought for ya how about making your businesses work for you and make clients happy and stop complaining. As my dear old mum use to say once your above ground and breathing thats half the battle won. Now only if certain people would how do you say take this advice and maybe crack a smile and go ahead with it.

 
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Posted by on 04/30/2013 in daily rants