http://youtu.be/VTZQnQeAPJc

I am firstly so sorry i havent been in touch. I am going thru the tough time of finding sumthing to write on. I mean i could write complete nonsense and i could either wear my heart on my sleeve and write what i truely believe in. So after much pondering and quite a lot of late nights spend note scribbling i have decided to write on a subject that i truely believe and also this subject can be at times quite  a Controversial topic. So i shall start with this piece and i do hope that i either dont get lynched by the mob but anyways if i was thought anything in this life is stick to what you belief in and you will go far in life.

So i have deicded to do a piece on animal rights and also what it means to me. Now after a lot of support from a  lot of my vegan and non vegan friends i will go ahead with this post.

Now where to start on being a vegan. Well i do have to start somewhere. So when i was younger i became a vegetarian for the simple reason was that i was against cruelity to animals and i also though that eatting meat was wrong. Although i was raised ona  diet of meat it was only when i was a teenager that i decided that i wanted to become a vegetarian. now the whole change over from eatting meat for the best part f her life to not eatting meat was simple enough for me. I decided that i could not imagine eatting anymore meat for the simple reason was because it was cruel and also i think of anything i did not want to add the the torture or pain that animals suffer in the factory and meat farms. I also felt that i was doing my bit for the enivorment and it was also better for my health and life style.

I will sadly admit that i did not follow thru with my promise of not eating meat and i did slip up once or twice.  But thru dedication and my own hard work. I have since remained meat for for a long time now. Now i have to say there is now a lot of alternatives now avaibale on the market for the vegetarian. Such as quorn products and tofu and for those of you who dont know what tofu is tofu is a soya based product that is avaible to buy and you can prepare a lot of nice meals with it.

But over the last while i have deicded to become a vegan. being a vegan was a simple change and chocie for me to make and take on. It was a challenge to give up dairy and animal products. I have to say the change over was simple for me and there was a lot of support offered to me on becoming a vegan thanks to my animal rights and vegan friends on the social networking site that is facebook. i think of anything there is now a lot of vegan supplaments that now can be purchased in many health stores. I think if anything the change over for me was quite simple.

Now with me becoming a vegan ther was a downside to it. Does everything that you really feel passionate for always seem to have a down side. sadly mine has come to negetaive comments make to me over my vegan and animal rights lifestyle. You see i always try to high light the issue of animal cruelity on  daily basis on facebook but sometimes people will not take me seriosuly at all. The usual questions i get from some people are mainly like right ok your a vegan where do you get your vitamins from. ohh right so if your a vegan what do you wear and why do you find such acts cruel on animals and here are my answers. Being a vegan i get my vitamins from my local health store. i also have a good diet of vegetables carbs proteins and yeah i also drink and eat a lot of soya products and i also enjoy eating tofu and mock duck products. My second answer to thw what do you wear products well simple again i dont wear animal products such as fur or leather or any other products that may have hurt animals in the process of the items getting made. Yes certain industrys such as the meat and also clothing industry and lets not forget the animal entertainment industry. you see with these industrys the people who work in them are incredically cruel to our animal friends. 

I think if anything if you did think to yourself right ok how are these industrys cruel to animals well i tell you what there is no such thing as cruelity free painless things that curel people do to animals. I mean when you think about it for example im ttattly against the fur and leather trade. i mean who thinks that its actaully right to litterly skin an animal alive and throw it aside all for what for fashion. yeah i think not. i mean i have seen plenty of videos on various animal rights websites and to hear an animal scream in the process of of getting skinned will actaully scare you half to death and at times make you cry and make you think seriosuly why do people do this for.

So when i read all about this horriable abuse that is done to animals i deicded enough was enough and thats when one day i deicded to take a stand and give our animal friends a voice. i have since joined a lot of pages on facebook and i have also decided to well give my own thoughts on the matter of animal abuse. so far been so supportive and have also in sum ways have defined in in saying ohh animals are such wuses and they dont feel pain. but i have to say in my own spin of things i have told many people my own reasons on why i dont support many many animal events that may hurt or ahrm the animal in any way. so i deicded to never go to the dog racing. I dont acatully like horse racing i dont like circues and also i really hate animal testing.

From my own point of view here where do we get or hope to achieve in such cruel tests to animals, I mean when you think about it animals and humans dont actaully have the same dna and yet countless experemients are being done on animals on shockly daily basis. I mean when you think about it how would you like pure pexiode poured into your eyes or even get certain objects shoved up in any opening of your body. now just imagine this is being done to you and you have no say in this. you can say no or scream or even bite back. well sadly people do this to animals and it really does break my heart.

But if you want to stop this you can. You can make the choice to not eat meat products. you can make the choice to not buy cruelity free products of any kind tthat are now avaiable on the market. You can also make a difference by not buying such products that may support animal cruelity cases. You can do this by doing research on how to buy such cruelity free products that are readliy avaibale to purchase and buy online now. But i think if anything the school both here in ireland and abraod should really bring a module on being nice to animals and not being cruel to them. i think if anything i was raised to never ever lift my hand to my own pets and if anything if this module was brought into our schools this could really lower the cases of animal abuse by half.

now again i feel so strongly on my animal rights views there is no right or wrong ways or views on who i feel. I think if anything animal rights issues are massively important to me and also its really about saving lives as well. FYI when i deicded to become an animal rights activist and also with my own choice on supporting such animal charities. I just want to make one thing clear. I would never ever hurt any1 in the process of saving animals and i will always try to raise the awareness of animals rights and issues. I just wanted to say that because some heartless idiot said there ages back that i should be well locked.. Now for the person who had said that to me i really had to get rid of. So many thanks again for reading this blog and also if you feel strongly about this issue well than come on forth and let the debating start.

you think the circus is fun think again. being locked up and beaten senseless for what performing tricks for idiot humans think again

im not sad that we dont speak im just sad you dont make the effort anymore

So for the last while i have been going thru recent changes in myself. I mean i know i said ages back that i might be going back to school. I also know that i said that i would be doing certain things in my life such as travelling or maybe even going on holidays abroad. But alas i have put a few plans on the back burner for a while. Mainly due to the fact that i have well other commitments in my life and well money has been tight of late. I mean who knew that you would need such things as a job money and even a few other things in order go get my plans up and running. I kid i kid of course i knew all this i mean that i would need funds in order to fufil my dreams and well they will happen all in a good time.

BUt sadly what i have noticed of late is that i have been drifting apart for a lot of my friends. I just remember this hit me last night. I was talking to my best friend in sydney and we were talking about gigs he went to and also up and coming tatts that we both might be getting. So as he went off to get his coffee. I checked out gigs that will be happening in the summer. Now im going to well plan to go to oxygen and electric picnic this year. I mean i was already offered tickets for the weezer gig and lord only knows im a massive weezer fan. So i happily clicked on the electric picnic webpage and i was very impressed to hear my favourite candadian cool kids arcade fire playing this year. So being all excited and simply bursting at the seems i texted every1. Come on who is with me for going to electric picnic we can all make a weekend of it and tickets are at good prices so comeon is with me on this. Now i did not hear naything yet and i took it into note that it was late last night and well every1 might be asleep. But nothing prepared for what news i got next. I got one text saying ohh thats like ages away and we will see. I was pretty dismayed and pissed at the same time. The last time i was this excited by anything was when simon fagan came to town and i got to meet him. Than it just hit me. I have out grown my friends.

Now i didnt cry i just thought ohh it looks like i have out grown every1. Now its kind of sad really now that i think about this. It also sent me spinning to my friend in sydney. Jeeze i hope your not going to dump me next. BUts sad when you realise sumthing like this. I have been friends with these people for years i went to school with them. I even catered for their nights at the pubs and night clubs i worked in and i even helped them wet the babies head. But apartily i ask my friends for too much of late. Now to say the least i would say that the friends that i have made in recent times that i have made on social networking sites are more like genuine friends to me than the so called friends that i did have. I mean if anything all it takes if a poke a quick hi and event a comment on a link or photo or song that they might have put up on their page. Now thankfully my mate in sydney was extremely kind enough to let me spin and than help me put with this situtaion and for that i would be lost without him. But seriously as for my so called friends well sadly it looks like its good from me. Do you know what i dont even feel sad when i think about it let alone say it. I have always been a self relant little ragamuffin 1 2 i dont acatully relate to my so called friends anymore and 3 well my friends on my social network site have been so awesome to me of late. They have also been there for me thru the thick and thin of it and also have made ma laugh out loud so many times im actaully surprised that i can stand up staright from the amount pf laughter that these people give me on a daily basis.

Now i do know that certain people have went thru certain changes such as having children moving abroad or even well other every day life. So to those people who have let me down. well its been swell but i really think that it might be my time to move on and well do my own thing. Now where is my tattoo artist friends and folk musican friends and fellow bloggers when i need them. 

Watch this space

So i have to say i have been going thru a some what interesting change in my life. I mean like nothing has happened of late work wise. But sumthing very interesting happen there at the weekend there. I was happily walking around my town with my vegan latte when i heard a familier voice say hello to me. It was a ghost from my past and to say the least i havent spoken to this ghost in a really long time. Now when it comes to my exes i sumwhat will admit i dont have the best case history when it comes to ex BFs. But i think if anything i would always try and stay friends with my exes. I mean im friends with 2 of my ex BFs on a social networking site and yes at times we do talk laugh share links and also check in to see how the other one is doing.

But i think with this ex well it was sumwhat surprising seeing him. So we went for a drink spoke for ages and exchanged blow by blow accounts of what is happening in our lives. What kind of made it sad when i told him about my own issues and about what has happened in my life. Now i cant really say much about whats happened to me but all i will say is my health kind of sucks of late. So when i told him all this. It hit him hit him really hard. Jesus you have been thru the wars havent you he said. Well you could say that yeah and also ahh im ok at times tis hard though to not well get thru the day without being upset.  So when i said that he just fell apart and said he lost sumthing in me.

When i heard this i actaully felt nothing i mean i treat life like the luck of the draw and im not saying this in a bad way but im kind of glad that we did end when we did. I mean i was in one of those relationships in where everything went wrong. we fough we made up we laughed til our sides hurt and well cried. but towards the end we kept fighting and we were not going anywhere. I will admit this im not sad about it at all. In actaul fact im kind of relieved if anything.

But if im being honest here he kind of half killed me that day. he more or less admited that i shoould get back together with him as i would not do any better. But i will tell you one thing. i could never ever settle for 2nd best or even go back into my past and well settle for that. Coz i know at the end of the day i know that i have good support network of friends and family who would like to see me happy. But i think my own mid is made up in what im going to do next.  

I think in having this alone time it has really made me think in what i want and what i need. Now i know what i want and what i need and i certainly dont mind waiting at all.  its just a matter of waiting for the right time and place and being with the right person.

So what news do i have since i last wrote sumthing. Hmm well i have been going to a few gigs have been going thru recent lifestyle changes and also sadlyh i have been slammed down on so hard like a fat ckid goes after chocolate cake. So sadly alas im not getting much work as i want to be. BUt this has been a good thing for me. I mean im in a market and a world of shallow god foresaken idiots that are called well therapists. Now in no means am i putting any1 down here. BUt sum people especaiily in this town really need to calm the f^^k down and chill the f**k out. I would like to say im making a bomb being a therapist but sadly im just about litterly breaking even. Which is sum what annoying and at times really fucking infurating as well. I mean as a therapist i have been adverting myself and well placing myself and even doing the grand thing of strutting myself like a prize animal at a show. But alas i get no way.

You see i feel like one of those strays in the pound that no one wants. (i know its a cruel comparson and i really hate using it) but its so true. Every time the cell rings i put on my happy voice i sell my soul and than sum and even say look i will even give you a discount. But alas they wont take me on. Now what really infurated me more of late was the following. I asked a friend ohh can i put posters up in your shop as i well need to pay the bills. Needless to say they said yes. Now a week later the poster went missing and than another girls poster showed up. NOw i kind of said what the hell im barely living as it is and also i need the business and also im more qualifcated. The answer to which i got infurated me more. well thingy is the friend of the family and shes starting out. Which made me quite angry and made me think seriously why in the name of god do i need you in my life so with that i just left it at that and walked away with my pride in tact.

Now when i talk about change again well who knows what will happen. Sadly i did make changes to go and travel and well do other things but sadly the ressession is sumwhat killing my dreams. Now please try and not mock me and say it will all be ok but seriously im a bit screwed. I try to smile and say yeah life is good but seriously its not all that good. But i will thank the budda that i have a roof over my head supporting friends and family and a lovely collie named shep to fall back on.

Before you read my blog I really think you should take 2 mins out to check out dressed as a girl but it carry’s a strong message in how use girls are not treated all that fairly for when it comes to our every day lives. You can than see that im working with a theme here for today’s piece.

So as you may or may not know its international woman’s day. So today is the day for the lovely species that is the all singing all dancing female sex. I mean I have to its pretty damn awesome being a woman. I mean we can do pretty damn amazing things. I mean we can well have friendships that can last from childhood that go well into adulthood. We can take in new friends and welcome them into our fold like their were our long lost buddies. We can also meet potential mates and than maybe just maybe marry the guy or girl. More importantly we can have as many children as we want. We can also have the ability to keep a house clean keep every one satisfied that may live in the household. But do know what I find pretty damn amazing for when it comes to my ladies. Well the ability to cope with any given task that is thrown to us. I mean I have seen and done it all when it comes to all things life wise and I have to say well we are pretty damn awesome.

But I have to say that while I simply gush over the fact that women are awesome sometimes were are the unsung heroes for when it comes to every day life. Many women that I know do have a lot of stuff to do. I mean running a house looking after children and going back to college is not an easy task but I know a few women who have done this and I have to say that I am simply in awe of how they do it. I know a really good friend of mine who is not only doing a physiology course but also is a full time mum to her little boy and is also working part time when I hear things like this im just simply lost for words. But I have to say not every1 life is dealt a good hand. I do remember a few years back I worked in a all female environment and I have to say this and I think sum people will not like me saying this at all. But some girls can be ruthless and in some cases mean as hell. I mean when I worked for this certain company it was hard at times to say the least but thankfully I raised above it and made it a personal mission not to partake in silly or stupid childish games. But I think now that I look back it actually made me stronger and it has also made me the person that I am today.

But if I’m really being honest here I must prefer working in a male dominated environment. I mean like I was a bit of a tom boy growing up and when I hit my late teens early 20s I started to work in the bar trade. Now working in the bar trade is such a blast I mean the fun I use to have with working with my guys was such a laugh. I would also roll with my boys for when it came to working in the bar but we always made the time to have a laugh after we finished work. But apart from working in the bar trade with a large group if males. I have worked in different areas and I have to say I know that now that I can have a laugh and a joke with my guys. But I think at the end of the day when it comes to both sexes I think that I have the up most respect hmm for both sexes if im being honest. I think if anything men and women have equal talents for when it comes to not only how we work rest and play but also we do know how to sort out our every day challenges that the world might throw at us. I mean if anything im being honest here I don’t know how to change a tire on a car nor do I know how to fit in a smoke alarm or even pro gramme my dvd player so yeah im not ashamed to admit it I just sometimes well call the well stronger sex when it comes to things like that.

But I have to say if anything what does kind of shock me really is the way that some rules are never ever going to change for use girls at all. I mean being in the job that I do I dont get paid much but as far as I know a man will get paid more so than me. I also know that if I do decide to well have a child and raise a child alone that I could have the odds stacked hugely against me in not being trated fairly and there is many many other issues I could bring up but im choosing not to and also I really dont have all day in raising up such subjects. I mean at the end of the day I do know a few things mainloy about myself. Im truly talented and mutli skilled. I can literally do 5 tasks altogether at the same time. ( I have experience in doing this from my waitress days). I am also good at science and problem Solving. Again this is a really good skill to have under the belt for every day life. I can also be rational patient compassionate non judgmental and very very kind. I can also well be there for my ladies and gents in times of not only having a ball on nights out. But I also make sure to be there for both my boy friend’s and girlfriends in times of sadness and woe. So if anything in by admitting to this am I a good person to have in your life. Well I like to think that I am. I also wanna dedicate this piece to all my ladies you know who you all are you I just simply love and adore each and every one of you. You girls rock and thanks for being there for not only thru the rib roaring side splitting good times but its also good to say that many of you were there for me thru my own times of sadness loss and long slow agonizing crying hours spend in woe.

I mean i didnt feel this way when i was doing the work this was manily because of the fact that i was on the student diet pf pot noodles red bull coffee and well the odd boozing session. But when i look back at it now. What was it all worth? i mean dont get me wrong im grateful for the work that i did and the certs that i got from the college was an added bonus but now i feel sort of out of the loop. I mean do my best to well make a few bob with my new skills but sumtimes you will get the odd fucker who will say ohh massage does not work. Oh i dont want smelly oils put on me when it comes to getting massaged. But you see this is why im sort of grateful that i went to college and graturated and well did all the work that needed to get done for the course. BUt now that i think about it. Im very grateful for the expereince that the stupid college gave me. Granted be it may it was a silly place that i went to but i feel as though i put in enough work to set me up for life.

Now i have to admit that i am taking a break mainly because of the fact that i have been working hard but also i think im going to be slefish here and decide on what i want to do. I think i have made up my mind of travelling abroad and yes im on the case as we speak of sorting iout my plans and making sure that everything falls into place for when the plans do go thru. But i also think that i have had to make massive changes in my own lofe in order to take up the life of a student. I mean when i was doing my holistic health studies i diodnt even have a bean to myself and i could not even go out. So while the other people that i went to college were out having a life i was up till silly hours

Im having a serious addiction to pop punk of late and i think its a good representation of who i am now and always will be  apop punk princess who does not follow lifes rules.

Right this is yet another personal blog piece of mind. I have been working on it on and off for the last while but i think with the day being in it i think that maybe it finally needs to get done.

Right as you may know i like many things. I like seeing live music i like going out and i also like bringing la pooch down to the beach for a run along the shore. But what i have to say i really like is tattoos. I for 1 love getting inked. I have 5 pieces of beautiful tattoo work on my body and yet i crave for more. I would sometimes spend hours drawing up designs and thinking about what would look good and not good on my body. I think for me getting inked is a part of who i am and no i will not change that for anyone at all. The pieces that i have on my body represent the time that i went thru in my life whether it be good or bad. I also have got family members done on my body & for me this represents who i am. But i think what has annoyed me of late is when certain haters go on about getting such nasty tats.

But i think for me i have never encountered the nasty or vicious side of people when it comes to me and my tats. I have well heard a few comments like oh yeah i dont really like that tat on your arm and oh yeah why would you get that piece out there for. I also run with the argument that its my body one and 2 shut the f&ck you dont know me or you dont know who i am. But i do remember a few years back i was at a do with a face from my past. Now i got dressed up and wore make up and well i decided to hit the town. So when i got to the venue i was greeted by friends and they kept sayng how nice i was and how my dress my pretty. This was great until i had an off the cuff comment by an ex friend of mine. Well you do look nice but dont take this wrong way but whats with your tats i dont like them and also girsl should not wear tats. When i heard this i was very surprised to say the least. My first reaction was ok your judging me over what i look like 1 and 2 who dided and gave you the right to judge me asshole. Now from personal expereince i could not be with sum one if they judged me over my tats. BUt i think what shocked me more was when my friend at the time didnt even back me up. Now needless to say i dont speak to thsi person anymore. But seriously why do people always feel the need to judge others on what they look like. Seriously some people can be such tools and i really have no time for them.

I think of anything i would be more for the heavily tattoed guy who rides a motor cycle and has tunnels in his ears than be with mr play it safe and boring in a suit. i think if anything people who make such comments on your appearnce should not be bothered to even think about. I mean i was out ages back and i was told that i am so pretty and that my tattoos give me more of a rock star look about myself. I think the day of people judging me over my appearnce is long past gone. I mean being the job that i am in being a massage and reflexologist there has been a few intersting coversations brought up over my tats. I have even had slighty older clients who have wanted to get inked. But i think if anything i for one love getting inked and well if i get more tats that is my business and no one elses and also why should i give a damn in whether people judge me over my tats.

I think at the end of the day people who feel the need to judge others over their appearances regardless of who they are or what they moght be might have a serious under lining condition that might affect their own views on how they see their own lives and this is why they might feel the need to judge others. I think if anything if and when i do get inked me it will be my choice and no one elses.

My own personal catholic joke if your easily offended look away now

So i will begin with my own faith so. When i was born i was raised to be a good little catholic girl. Mum and dad would take me to church on Sundays and then after the church we would go for sunday dinner.  But while i was growing up things changed really. I mean i had to go few life changing decisions in my own life. Firstly i lost my dad due to a heart attack at 9 years old. I think if anything experience of death. I mean i had no one close to me that died before this happened. But all i remember is that my mum told me that dad sadly passed on and now he would go to heaven. So being a young child i took her word and i went to my fathers funeral and i said no more on the subject. So as i got older more family relations sadly passed on and i did the funeral thing again.

Now being raised a catholic girl i had a strict up bringing. I had to be a good girl and if i did anything wrong i was also given out to and sometimes punished. Like such as if i back talked to my mum i was sent to my room. Or i did something really bad it was always well you would bring shame onto the family and so on.  But as i got older my faith was questioned many times. This would be at the times  of loss and whatever i went thru.  Sadly a few years back a really good family friend of mine sadly died and i of course had to go to th funeral.  Now i went to the mass and the funeral. But what made me sad was a few cutting comments that was made by the older people in the church.  You know the so called lead by example generation. I heard a very cutting comment about another funeral that she want to. The comment was as follows oh you know such and such a person wont go to heaven coz they committed suicide. Now when i heard the comment it really upset me massively. I think if anything no one should ever be judged on if they do or do not take matters into their own hands.  If they do well that their decision and i think if anything it should be their business.

I think if i am being honest here i decided to change religions of late. The decision for me to change religions was mainly because of the fact that i was so sick to death of people saying that i would go to hell for doing bad things or having such impure thoughts. I mean i remember ages back i made the biggest mistake of my young life by dating an older guy. Now what drew me to my mistake was he was charming good looking smart sexy and well yeah he charmed me in many other ways. But as i got to know him more it was clear that he was not suited for me. For example he would fly off the handle over silly subject matters. One being a case that he wasnt my first guy to be with. He would fly off the handle call me a few names and i would just roll my eyes and say well baby i had a life before i met you. Another example would be is he had such an issue with me liking the country australia. Oh why do you like australia for. well i like the country 1 2 the people are so damn nice and lovely and really awesome and 3 well i dated an australian guy. He would than again fly off the handle. Which made me think oh right you have such a massive problem with me loving australia and having a life before i met you. Now you can either get lost and stop bothering me about this problem you have with me or you can stay with me and just move on. So the bloody idiot stayed with me more fool me hey.

So everything was fine until the xmas before last. I decided to get the idiot a st Christopher medal. St Christopher was the patron saint of landscape gardeners accounts and people who travelled over seas. Now i gave him the gift and he completely lost the head. He screamed at me and shouted at me saying that he wasnt religious and how dare i get him such a gift. Looking back i felt terrified to say the least and i thought to myself right you’re a bloody psycho. Now i started with him for a little while. but anything that this thing had a drink he would spiral into a whole into a different and dark and dangerous world. I know that i dabble in the dark side myself and listen to heavy rock and watch horror films but this guy made me out to be an angel. In actual fact if you compared me and him. I would be the nice angel he would be the devil and then some. which kind of made the relationship with him a lot tougher.   I remember i that night he brought up the subject of religion to a few good friends of mine from the north of Ireland. Now being a bartender i have a few simple rules that everyone should really take in hand. I politely that you dont talk about religion politics or any other subject matters that might spoil a good night out. Now of course dickhead would not listen to me and he brought up the subject of religion. He asked my friend who is a devout catholic girl who goes to church and raises her young family to be catholic has she seen or even met god? Now my friend said whats this got to do with anything. i was raised catholic and this is what i believe in and try and respect my views. Now himself was like a dog with a bone and would not let it rest. SO to say the least i had to cut my evening short and comfort a very sad friend of mine who ended up in tears and stand between my idiot ex and my friends husband who was a rugby player. When i got him i ripped into him. How bloody dare you make that girl question her faith that is her business if she’s catholic. He than would keep arguing with me and  than he said something that was very unforgivable that i cant even say in this piece. Needless to say i dumped his sorry ass the next day.

Ahh my little budda dude always rub is belly for good luck

Which kind of brings me to this what or who gives the right for people to question each others faiths. I think if you choose to go with a faith that you truly believe in than i would stay with it. I know my own mother is catholic and i respect for it and im also glad that she has raised me to be a good catholic girl and for this im grateful that she has down this for me.  But of late i have questioned my own faith. I mean when i broke up with idiot i went thru a very heavy and dark stage in my life. The darkness left me questioning everything about who i was about where im going to in life. Now thankfully i have left that all behind me and i decided to change religions and become a buddha. I have always like the spiritual religions and i have to say in becoming a buddha it has saved me from well-doing bad things to myself. I have also found that found that i can find forgiveness within myself and in others who may have hurt me in the past.  I think for me what is also awesome about being a buddha is the need that you don’t need to feel materialist about every day things.

I mean I have met a few people in my life who are so materialist in their every day lives and in a way i feel a bit sorry for them. I mean i know this one guy who spend a silly amount of money on a car. If though his girlfriend was going to have a baby that was due any day. So when i pointed out that he should of really put money aside for the baby he more or less said that well this is my car and my money and i will do whatever i want with it. When i heard this i felt sad for him in a way. But it turns out karma got her own back on him. last thing i heard was his back living with mummy and daddy and the GF and mother of this child decided to go back to where they originally came from.   So in a way karma dealt with that problem in a really good style.

I have to say from my own experience being a buddha is truely an excellent lifestyle choice. Im more calm than i have ever been i dont get upset at all. I have also found inner peace within myself and i feel great for it.  BUt i also thinki that in being a buddha you can find inner peace within yourself and not many people can actually admit this at all.

Oh yeah i should really dedicate this piece to my friend who always have me in stitches laughing and who have never ever felt the need to judge me at all.

I should also dedicated this piece to a really good friend of mine who sadly died last week. They decided to well take their own life. I think if anything  i di hope that they are in a better place and i know that it actaully hurts me that i miss them so so much. I really do miss our chats and also miss the way how you always made me laugh and how you made me feel comfortable in your company and i also loved the fact that we could talk about anything and everything for when it came to the inner working of the human mind, Miss you so so so much D and i just simply adore the ground well you did walk on. I just hope your in a better place bro and i do hope you find inner peace within yourself.

This good charlotte is for for my friend D.

So just at the weekend gone i managed to go out for a change. Now firstly i have to adit i havent been out in ages and when i got invited to go to a gig i jumped at the chance and went for it. Now i got to go to a very cute little italian restaurant in town they served the most amazing and nice food ever.  I can’t exactly remember the name of the restaurant but i do know that it was off the ha penny bridge there in the heart of the city. So when I had my meal. I headed into the venue to see my gig.

I found this really cute place called the grand social in Dublin and I have to say I was not disappointed to say the least.  The grand social is a very nice cute bar and night club combined. The staff are so so nice friendly and so down to earth. The drinks were not that expensive and going on first impressions here i have to say that place is so so nice. Its got a very nice bohemian feel to it and i have to say that crowd that drink there are really nice as well. I think from my own personal experience of working in the bar trade it’s probably the nicest bar i have been to in ages. There was such a great choice of both local and international beers and wines cocktails as well. 

The Grand Social Dublin

So while i was waiting for my gig to start the staff were friendly to say the least and really did make me feel welcome and put me at ease. So i than went up to the night club part of the of the grand social and i have to say i was impressed. To best describe the upstairs part of the grand social would be intimate and comfy. Nicely spaced out tables and a huge stage to boot really does make the experience of seeing a gig for the first time a really enjoyable experience.  

The lovely Maggie Hillard performing her set.

I got the great pleasure of seeing the lovely and truly awesome Simon Fagan and his supporting acts performing that night. his first supporting act was in the shape and form of a lovely and very sweet and oh so cute irish singer song writer Maggie Hillard. To describe maggies singing style would be for me Laura Marling meets Cathy Davey.  Shes truly awe-inspiring  and her singing is really good. She also did a cover version of dolly partons Jolene. In doing this Maggie got everyone to sing along with her but i was true to form the only person singing along to her and yeah i had fun in doing it.  Maggie did a few other of her own songs and i have to say that i really enjoyed her set. I think if anything Maggie has a true talent and with a voice and stunning good looks to match her talents she will go far. I have to say I highly enjoyed maggies set and i do hope that i do get a chance to see her perform again.

Gypsies on the Autobahn performing their set

The second act that i had the great chance of seeing was a young Dublin band called Gypsies on the Autobahn. Now to describe the band they would sound like the corona’s meet snow patrol.  The band write and perform their own songs.  I have to say the performance was truly amazing and very good indeed. The singer can hit the harmony quite high and i have to say that they were very good in their own right. They played a good set and i would highly recommend checking them out. They are on Facebook and if you type in gypsies on the autobahn and check them out you will not be disappointed at all.

Simon Fagan Performing at the grand social

Now i have to say when i saw the warm up for Simon Fagan it was truly awe-inspiring to say the least. his band set the stage for a truly awe inspiring night. When Simon performed on the stage it was so amazing and very awe-inspiring to say the least.  Now Simon writes and sings his own songs and i have to say i actually found myself humming along to nearly all his songs. To best describe Simons music style would be american style folk meets jazz blues and he had the voice and talent as well as his good looks. I was first introduced to Simons Fagan’s music well a few years back and when i heard his song hired and fired i was truly hooked then.  I think when i heard that song for me it was love at first sight litterly well for me it was when i first heard his music. .  All thru the night he played songs from his new album as well as doing a few cover versions. He did a truly amazing cover version of true colours which was just simply amazing and actually got me all misty eyed.

I think its fair to say the least that i had so much fun at the Simon Fagan gig and i also have to say that Simon has a great and unique talent in working with his fans and making them feel very welcome at his gigs. I think if anything for a first time seeing my favourite singer perform i have to say yet again it was really awesome. I have to say what i also loved about Simons gig was when he was performing the set and when it came to performing his song plastic compass he threw in a good story of his band going to a gig in meath and than getting lost along the way. I just kind of laughed at the that and i did see the funny side of this cute story.  I think that i have to say that i had a truly amazing night Simon Fagan is a truly excellent performer singer song writer and he’s got a bucket load of talent that will go far. I think if anything if you do get a chance check out Simons music on youtube and hes also on myspace facebook twitter. I think my highlight if the night was when he performed my favourite song damn honey. I was even singing along to it and its such a good good song as well.

But what i think what made the night for me is when i got to meet him at the end of the night. Hes so so down to earth and very lovely indeed. Hes got a lot of time for his fans and i even got a photo of him as well.  i think if anything i had such a great time and as far as i know Simon does play abroad and he also plays on his home soil as well. I think if anything if you ever get the chance to see Simon Fagan play i would highly recommend you go and see him. You will not be disappointed at all.

Myself meeting the lovely and awesome singer and song writer Simon Fagan

I should also say that i got the great chance to enjoy the gig with a truly nice and fellow Dublin girl called Angela. Now Angela reviews gigs and she would post them up on irishunsigned.ie. I would highly recommend that every checks out this blog as it will out you in the know of whats going on in the irish music scene as well. I would also love to dedicated this piece to the lovely Angela thank you so so much again sweetheart for such an excellent time and i have to say the craic that i had with her was only 90.  Thanks again Angela for the most excellent time.

here is a link of simon fagan performing damn honey such a great song

Luck only can favour those who go searching for it

So when i was little i was always told that lady luck always stacks up in the favours of the gambler who may have the winning hand right.  Well i have to say here that i complete disagree with this statement.  I think fortune can favour anyone really. It’s not always about having the winning hand or have a system luck is down to the individual and and how they see their way of using their luck.  You see a little while back i came into some money it was small lotto win. i remember that day like it was yesterday. I was flat broke with not a penny on me at all. So when i was doing my chores of cleaning my house and getting my clothes washed i had a wee rut in my jeans pockets.  This is when i found 20 euros.  Oh i thought this is great i can now do the lotto for tonight and get sum stuff that i need from the shops.

So while i happily skipped along to the shop to do my lotto and get my goodies. I didnt think anything of it when i handed my money in for my ticket. Now the day that was in it was a good day really. But not so good either. I remember that from the previous week i had the week from hell. My grant for college fell thru my friend had a heart attack and i had a massive row with the college over the grant falling thru. So all in all it was a shit week to say the least. So when i skipped along home i just sat quietly in room reading my book and than went down stairs to cook dinner. My mum actaully joined me for dinner that evening and than i just watched the lotto. pah we wont win anything i know we wont. We never do. So as the numbers came out i was like ok so we have 2 numbers big deal i said. that will get us nothing. So when it came to the 3rd number i was like yippee 15 euros hmm that will buy us dinner. So when it came to the 5th number i was than thinking this is not happening. So long behold when my 6th number came out it was on the other line. i than just stood there in shock. No no shaking my head that just didnt happen did it. I said to my mum. She also stood there in shock. I than just calmly said right ok hmm we have 5 out of 6 numbers so what do we get very little i suppose.

So after a night of having no sleep at all. i than happily skipped along to my local post office. me being all coy and shy handed in my ticket and asked i was like hmm yeah ok did i win anything on this. So the girl scanned the ticket and gave me my prize. You have won 1500 euros i was like your serious right? fuck me i screamed not litterly of course but still wow thank you so much. I than went home and gave my mum some money. When i came home i was in a serious amount of shock and awe at the same time. I just kept looking at the money and i said to myself wow like i have never won anything. I also came second or third and the last time i won anything was at a painting competition when i was 8 years old. But still it was such a nice win.

i think i was grateful for the win in a way. It was small yes but it was a massive amount of money to me. I mean i got really nice things from it. Many twilight goodies a few cds put some way of course as well.  But when i think it now. Life is about the luck of the draw. I mean if i did get the whole 6 numbers who knows what might of happened.  I mean when i think about it would the big win change me? well no not really. I think if anything if it happened again. I would have packed everything take mum in one hand shep in the other get our passports and move abroad. I mean like at the end of the day. If i were to pack up tomorrow and move abroad i dont think i would miss anything or anyone here in ireland. Of course i would take 4 legs with me of course.  but you see when you think of the world we live n and the what ifs it can make you think.  I mean with my little win it made me think more about who i am about and where im going in life.

I mean im not one of those materialist kind of people who defines her life by buying the top range choice of shoe animal or product no. Im more ahh ok so we will go with the flow kind of thing here you know. Whats the point in struggling bitching moaning and sobbing about what lack of material goods we have in our lives. Dont get me wrong but i love my books and well jeans as well. But if god forbid my house burns down tomorrow pray to budda it wont it would not bother me. Coz at the end of the day its just stuff really. I could easily replace stuff it does not bother me at all. But what bothers me is when people feel the need to drone on and on about how much they pay for shoes and clothes. 

i mean i have a good on for you. I was out in Dublin ages back at a gig and i was happily listening to the music of the band when i heard this scream. like oh my god girlfriend i have just broken my heel from the jimmy choos and they cost me like 500 euros. I actaully felt phyically sick when i heard this. In all my days of being on this planet i have never ever spend 500 euros on myself ever. I think the only time i did that was when my idiot gobshite ex got a friend of a friend to fix my laptop. i than had to cough up the cash for a technician to well unravel my wee laptop who had died a death a few times over and needed surgery badly on it. now the D4 darling how was screaming about her beloved shoes. I kind of felt sorry you life is defined by what shoes you wear. Hmm and let me guess you dont date anyone who even nothing less than a footballer salary. yeah your one sad bitch and also your mask that is made of botox and fillers  that you hide in is actaully made you look like you have cant show emotion.

nah i think myself there is no way i could spend that sill amount of money on a pair of shoes and also yeah there is more to life than shoes and designer clothes. Your life if anything and im going from my own experience should be about what you can do to make it flow along nicely with no hassle or complication. I mean i havent got much money myself but hey it does not bother me at all.  All im grateful for is a roof over my head. My friends and family and my little dude shep. I could not ask for more really. Although it would be tres nice to have a nice boyfriend who adores the ground i walk in and loves me for me. But hey until my handsome beau comes running into my arms whether it be here or abroad.   (FYI my beau is not in ireland i looked around and alas could not find him at all) Im thinking it would be more so abroad but i think i could happily sail along my own life with no mess or no fuss.

 Also whoever said that money makes you happy. They were actually kidding themselves. Money does make a life a little easier i mean you can buy the stuff you want and go where you want and have a life of great fun but with great fun comes responsiblity and also when the so called well of money dry up who is there to you know pick you up when you fall down. I know from experience my very own actually i have always led a life of no fuss and worries. i think its only the fools who try and buy their way into a life of excess fun games and endless hours of joy. But like everything else that can come with a price.  i for one will never ever buy into a fools paradise of broken dreams and messed up visions of their so called happiness.

nah i think im happy for all my friends who can make me laugh and fall around the place in tears of laughter. Im also grateful for the chosen few who can put me back together like an accordion.  In the very sense of well putting my broken parts back together just like a jigsaw.  fo that you know who you all are and i thank each and every one of you. If money was no object i would than buy you a red ducati motorcycle or a red porche sportcar. Well seeing as the fact that i have no money you will just have to make do with my company and my endless awe inspiring words hee hee so take it all in people. lets not forget my truely great company as well. i can acatully say im not only a good friend/lover but im everything that you want me to be and more. Nope users need not apply as i just ignore them.